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Are You Sleeping with the Enemy?

Yes, I know the word of God says a wife is to submit to her husband in all things. Many men like to use that scripture to remind their spouses of their wifely duties. But, what happens if you are, "Sleeping with the Enemy?" It is very hard for a woman to be sexual when she doesn’t know who is going to show up in her bed at night. Will it be Dr. Jekyll or Mr. Hyde? When a woman is married to a man that is unpredictable it is very hard for her to “get in the mood”. Women are emotional beings. It seems as though men can separate their emotions from their testosterone, but it is very hard for a woman to separate her emotions from the physical act of making love. In most cases in order to be lovely, women need to feel loved. That is where the whole notion of, doing the dishes by day will get a man some loving at night, came from. It makes a woman feel loved and appreciated and therefore she doesn’t mind pleasing her husband. However, when a woman is married to man that is hateful and belittles her at every turn, she has no desire to bring him any pleasure at all. This includes any type of abuse, whether it be mental, physical, verbal or otherwise. When abuse is present, she really doesn’t want him rubbing up against her thighs or any other parts of her body. Truth be told, I know many women who have prayed to God that their husbands wouldn’t come to bed at all, and if they did, they hoped they would be too tired and wouldn’t want to touch them. If you’ve never held your breath, pretended to be sleeping, or felt your skin crawl at the thought of being touched in that way by an aggressive and or controlling man, consider yourself blessed. If you are “Sleeping with the Enemy”, please know that these feelings are not normal, even though they may have become the norm. Seek help. This is not what real love feels like. Husbands are instructed to love their wives as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for it. God will correct you, but He will never abuse you. Therefore, neither should your husband.

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